Football
‘Twas the Night Before Christmas … OSU Edition
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a happy bowl season.
‘Twas the night before Christmas, five days before the bowl game;
Not a player was playing, not even Alex Hale improving his field-goal aim.
The lights at Boone’s stadium were seen from far and from near,
Signaling good tidings and great cheer from another Mike Gundy-coached winning football year.
Preseason visions they were bold and bombastic;
Who’d have thought then offensive line injuries would be so goshdarn drastic?
There was still plenty to be thankful for, as Santa Claus prepped Rudolph and Blitzen;
I’m personally thankful for Trace Ford and Calvin Bundage’s dual-sided blitzin’. (Rhyming Blitzen and blitzin’ is my career peak. Plz clap.)
There was Tylan’s return, too, from a nasty ACL tear;
No. 2, he was fierce, NFL fans will soon be aware.
There was Chuba and Spencer, and Dillon Stoner’s last glory days;
I’ll miss Stoner the most, that mustache-dawning receiver was always unfazed.
Tre Sterling’s hard-hitting was a big bright spot too;
That Sunnyvale kid will be in the NFL, and I expect it’ll be quite soon.
Kolby Harvell-Peel and Rodarius Williams, they deserve their own verse;
There’s really no good rhyme for them though, so hold just a second while I smash backspace and go in reverse. . .
The Cheez-It Bowl ending is perhaps not what fans pictured;
I can see now all you diehards are upset and flat triggered.
But a 7-3 season, much worse things could be,
Look no further than Lawrence, where Kansas went completely win-free!
As the season winds down, in conjunction with Christmas Eve,
I hope you’re like me and find ways not to grieve.
There’s always next year, friends;
I’m sure Gundy has something up his right sleeve.
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