Joseph Randle asked for a massage after getting arrested

Lesson No. 1 in shoplifting: Don’t ask for a massage roughly the same price as the stuff you stole when you get to the police station.

Joe Randle acted the way you would expect somebody who just stole underwear and cologne to act after being arrested: like a complete moron.

The whole thing is completely bizarre and culminates when Randle asks why his height and weight isn’t on his mug shot. The officer responds.

“Whit is not a damn trading card.”