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Boone Pickens Owns Drake



I’m having trouble typing the words, really, because of what the 84-year old oil magnate did to the 25-year old Canadian rapper on the Twitters Wednesday night. This is like the Gundy/Bieber thing but, you know, actually cool.

Let me just show you the tweets, I need to shut up and let old man benefactor do the talking…

First, Drake humblebragged his way to an innocuous but satisfactory statement about how he’s way richer than any of us…and then Boone just slayed him (see below).

This left everyone who follows anyone who knows what’s going on utterly stunned. There were so many questions: “does Boone follow Drake?” (he doesn’t). “How did he find the tweet?” (here). “Wait….is this a fake account?” (nope, certified with the blue check). “WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE???” (nobody, and I mean NOBODY, knows).

Drake walked away, beaten badly by his North American brethren and fellow 1%er, yet with enough moxie to realize what was what.

(according to my sources, “stunted” means “to be made a fool of”)

I’m done here [drops mouse on desk, walks away].

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