Kenny Gajewski Reflects on Last Week’s Tragic Bus Accident

STILLWATER — Last week, Oklahoma State softball was involved in the unthinkable when the team’s bus hit and killed a pedestrian.

“I can’t even begin to tell you what it was like,” Oklahoma State coach Kenny Gajewski said. “I’ll try. … There’s nothing in the handbook that prepares you for this, and I think there’s probably nothing in the handbook of life that prepares you for anything like this.”

KOCO’s Jonathan Greco wrote that the Oklahoma Highway Patrol collision report found that the bus attempted to change lanes but was unable to avoid the pedestrian.

“It just happens so fast, and you just go into like crisis mode,” Gajewski told reporters earlier this week. “I mean, you’ve got a family of somebody who’s now not here, you gotta, I mean, you know you’re you gotta have some sort of thought about them and how all that happened.

“And I, first thing I did was go back to the bus and try to get them under control and make sure everybody was okay, that nobody was hurt first, and then try to gauge what the eyes are telling you. We had some people in shock, without a doubt, and I don’t even, to be frank, I don’t think too many of them actually saw what I saw. I think only one person saw and truly saw. … I think what we find out is how powerful your brain is because your brain starts concocting what you think you saw, what you heard.”

That wasn’t the last time Gajewski spoke of the brain’s ability to fill in the gaps with a similar respect-fear combo often used to describe natural disasters.

“It wants to take you to places you don’t need to be,” Gajewski said.

Gajewski also recalled some of the things he said to the driver in those horrible moments after.

“Like, ‘Are you okay? It’s not your fault. I saw what happened. It’s not your fault,’” Gajewski said. “Making sure that he is okay. I mean, I can’t imagine what he’s going through.”

Then, Gajewski needed to make a lot of decisions, somewhat quickly. The first one, and it sounds like the easiest, was getting word to counselor Kevin Andrews to come up and help Gajewski support the players and staff.

Then he had to call Wichita State and let them know the Cowgirls wouldn’t be able to play that night.

“I’m sure there’s things we did wrong,” Gajewski said. “I’m sure there’s things we did right. I’m sure of one thing, any decision that we made, I wanted to make for what was going to be the best thing for us, not what other people thought would be good for us.

“And probably nobody knows our team and program better than I do, and I wanted them to make sure that whatever we did from that point forward was in good alignment for what was going to be the best thing to help these kids start to deal with what we’re going through. … (keeping in mind), what I if this was my kid, what I would want. … I just didn’t want to bring these kids back. Have to do it again the next day, repack, do that again, drive by that, that place, put them through all that again. I just didn’t think that would be the best thing.

“And I did not want to bring them home and drop them off and then go back to their rooms and dorms and apartments and start thinking. I wanted them to be around us and Kevin and our staff and do the things that are as normal as can be, like have a team meal and be together.”

Two of his players briefly elaborated on what it was like for them last week.

“Everyone, like we prayed, we held hands, we hugged, we sat with each other,” senior Lexi McDonald said. “Like it was just scary, like it’s just a scary, traumatic event. And so being able to just comfort each other with something that. Like we can’t take for granted, and something I don’t think we will or ever will, is having people in your corner.”

“It was really scary,” freshman Aubrey Jones said. “And there’s a lot of emotions involved, but he (Gajewski) did a good job, just like talking to us, letting us all know that no matter how you’re feeling, it’s okay. Everyone’s gonna react differently. And we were fortunate enough to have Kevin, our mental guy, come and be with us all weekend, which was really helpful for anyone that needed it. But we did a good job, not like just brushing it under the rug, like we acknowledged what happened and that it was really sad and unfortunate.”

Gajewski said he appreciates the support he and the team have received over the last week. He also stressed that this isn’t something that just goes away.

“So tough, it’s tough stuff, and it’ll be tough for a long time,” he said. “I think it kind of hit me at the end of our game, the last game (at Iowa State on Sunday), I just kind of broke down, and I just, I thought I was okay.

“And you then you start to talk, and you kind of can finally take a breath for a moment, and it’s when it kind of hit me.”